Why I need to spill it out..

"TRAPPED"

Recently, i have been busy painting for a gallery, i will not yet mention the name, but i am terribly trembling with excitement about my first ever solo exhibition. i'm not too sure if i should upload all my new ten works here just yet. but i'll tell you this, it's mindblowing! I have already taken them to the gallery to be documented, and when i saw them all against the wall on the floor for the first time, if i didn;t know better i knew i would have knelt down and cried. All my problems, my moments of ups and downs, my memories, my laughters, my tears and sweat were all there revealed naked. And soon, everyone will see. All ten of them felt like one all shouting back the flashbacks of everything that i have been going through.
If not for all the wounds that i have in my heart, if not for the happiness i have won and lost i wouldn't have been able to create these paintings.
We wouldn't know how to love if we didn't know how to hate. We wouldn't know what silence was if there weren't any noise.. now where did i hear that from? i don't rememer anymore.
i hope and pray that my exhibition will be a successful one and most of all, i hope everyone will like me for who i decided to be, which is me and not what people wanted me to be.
i sometimes am sorry that i happen to be so different. and i hope my husband will forgive that i am not and cannot be an ideal wife. but i do try, and i know i try too hard.
these series will be for him.
I think i'll name my exhibition "Hiding as still as a Tree on a windless day"... hmmm.. maybe too long.
let me know what you think...